Preteens and Depression or Anxiety
Why Is My Teen Sleeping So Much?
Tired? Overbooked? Worn out? So is your teenager. Research suggests more than 70 percent of teens are stressed out. While many parents believe teenagers have nothing to worry about and warn that life only gets harder, the teen years may be the first time your child learns what stress is, how to manage it, and how to excel in the face of challenge.
According to a study of teens in Baltimore, the five most common sources of teen stress included school work (78%), parents (68%), romantic relationships (64%), friends (64%), and siblings (64%). Adolescents are learning to deal with difficult classes, competition to get into a top college, bullies, peer pressure, body and hormone changes, dating, drama with friends, family conflicts, negative feelings about themselves - and that's just the beginning.
A Little Stress Goes a Long Way
Stress is the body's natural response to challenge, allowing us to be alert and focused to meet the demands of daily life. When faced with a difficult situation, our brains trigger the "flight or fight" response, a primitive, automatic survival instinct, which produces a faster heart rate, increased blood flow to muscles, heightened senses, upset stomach, and a sense of fear or dread.
While a little stress can be healthy, feelings of anxiety and tension that are protracted over a long period of time can leave you feeling depleted or overwhelmed, weaken the body's immune system, and cause other emotional and physical problems. The good news is our minds are powerful enough to turn off the stress response and turn on a "relaxation response," which leads to decreased heart and breathing rate and a sense of well-being. By developing stress management skills to turn on the relaxation response, teens can feel less helpless and better equipped to handle life's complications.
Signs of Stress Overload
Each individual experiences stress differently. Some become angry or turn to drugs or alcohol, while others withdraw and internalize their problems. A survey conducted by The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University reported that high-stress teens are twice as likely as low-stress teens to smoke, drink, and use illegal drugs. Here are a few warning signs that the stress is becoming too much for your teen:
Tips for Managing Stress
Teens can decrease stress by using the following techniques:
Don't Overschedule. If you are overbooked and exhausted, consider dropping one or two activities and keeping only the ones most important to you.
Stop Expecting Perfection. No one is perfect, including you, but you do have unique strengths and abilities that you can capitalize on. Be realistic about your expectations of yourself and others by focusing on doing a good job, not a perfect one. If you need help, ask for it.
Catch Some Zzzs. Sleep is an important way to replenish and refresh the mind and body after a stressful day. For adolescents, the biological "sleep clock" shifts to make them stay up later and sleep in longer. However, with the typical school day starting early in the morning, many teens aren't getting the 8-9 hours of sleep they need.
Take Care of Your Body. Exercise is proven to reduce stress and improve physical and emotional well-being. Join a sports team, work out at a gym, or take a walk every day to clear your head. Nutrition also can impact your body's ability to manage stress. Try to avoid caffeine and "stress foods" like chips, fast food, and sweets, and fuel your body with regular meals consisting of healthy proteins and fruits and vegetables. Too much stress can lead to the need to "escape" through drugs and alcohol or other unhealthy behaviors. A good workout or talk with a friend will be much more productive and won't leave your body fatigued and run down.
Learn to Relax. Build into your schedule time for fun, calming activities like reading a book, drawing, writing in a journal, playing sports, listening to music, or watching a movie with friends. For particularly trying times, like right before a big test or athletic event, learn a few breathing exercises and muscle relaxation techniques to center yourself.
Solve Problems One at a Time. Prioritizing tasks and assignments is a skill you will use for the rest of your life. Start by accomplishing a few small tasks and cross them off your list. Once you're confident you can look at a problem, analyze options, and take action to resolve it, you can conquer the larger tasks. The more your practice these skills, the more resilient you will become.
Monitor Your Outlook and Self-Talk. Your thoughts, attitude, and outlook on life affect the way you see things. You can drastically reduce your stress level if you choose to focus on the positives and stay optimistic about the future. If you run into a problem, think of it as a challenge and learning experience and remember that almost all problems are temporary and solvable. Reassure yourself with positive affirmations like "I can handle this" rather than dwelling on thoughts like "My life will never get better." By focusing on things you can control and letting go of things you cannot control, you will remain calm in the face of adversity.
Build a Support System. Having people you can turn to in times of crisis can greatly reduce your stress. Foster close relationships by investing in others, actively listening to them, and keeping commitments to family and friends. Be there to help others, and don't be afraid to ask for help in return.
What Parents Can Do
Parents can help their teen by:
With all of the changes taking place during adolescence, stress is inevitable. In addition to the challenges unique to being a teenager, many teens are consumed by world problems (terrorism, global warming, crime) and adult issues (death, divorce, poor health) as well. Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the pressures of entering the "real world" are too much. If your teen is acting out, experimenting with drugs or alcohol, or exhibiting unusual behaviors, work with him to reduce the stress in his life. By developing coping skills and practicing stress management techniques, teens can learn to turn stress into a tool for success.