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"Rather than going to your teen's favorite social networking site, finding something disagreeable and then telling him your were looking at his profile, talk about it first. Let him know that a condition of his being allowed to use MySpace, Facebook or the next big thing to come along is that you have access to his page. The purpose of this conversation is not to negotiate, but to underscore the value you place on being upfront and honest."Instead of creating a profile of your own and trying to "sneak a peek" at your daughter's Facebook page, ask her if the two of you can look at her profile together. Most young people don't think they post anything dangerous on these web sites, but often they're unaware of little things (pictures or comments) that would make them vulnerable to online predators. Make sure your teen knows that your primary focus is to help her be safe.
Labels: interferring, internet, privacy
posted by ByParents-forParents at 4:28 PM
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"Every time Jane writes or reads one of those [keywords], Cindy gets an email and can see what she's up to. It's a far cry from past generations, where parents knew what their kids were up to. The family telephone didn't offer much privacy."Parents have reason to worry. Nearly one-third of all teens who are online have been contacted by a stranger. Still, some kids and parents consider this level of monitoring an invasion of privacy and insist there are other ways to keep kids safe. It's a debate that's likely to continue as long as there are teens, parents, and the Internet.
posted by ByParents-forParents at 8:47 PM
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"It is difficult to determine the limits of what is appropriate to share with your kids about your own life. Teenagers can be remarkably persistent when it comes to "building a case" in support of minimizing their own transgressions. The last thing we want is for them to use our youthful indiscretions as ammo against us. We have already suffered enough. Do our kids need to know this stuff? Is it helpful, even?"When sharing details about your personal life, you are free to use your own discretion. The same is true of your personal space. Married couples have the right to spend time alone, behind locked doors, and are not obligated to answer questions about their activities. Similarly, single parents need their time alone as well.
Labels: boundaries, communication, privacy
posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:13 PM
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"A mentor and author of My Feet Aren't Ugly: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out (Beaufort Books), [Debra] Beck believes that parents today need to reassess how they're approaching parenting. According to Beck, 'Too often, parents inadvertently give their [kids] mixed messages. By sneaking around and looking at a teen's MySpace page, listening in on private conversations and snooping, parents are teaching that honoring someone's privacy isn't that big of a deal.'"Open lines of communication can be difficult, but are vital during your child's teenage years. Talk to your child, not at her. This will give you the opportunity to discuss important issues like drinking, without pushing her away. Read more online.
Labels: parenting, privacy, role_models
posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:38 PM
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