News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

Teen dating remains a contentious topic within many families. In a Nov. 1 article on the website of the Hattiesburg American, parenting expert Doreen Nagle (author of the book But I Dont Feel Too Old to Be a Mommy) advises parents to acclimate their teens to the dating world by following a process she describes as graduated dating

The first thing many parents consider when devising dating rules is at what age can their teens start to date? One way to approach this is with "graduated" dating - first a small gathering or birthday with a few friends of the opposite sex in your home.

This could lead to a small gathering of teens off to see a movie together without a parental chaperone. From there, two or three couples can perhaps go out for a casual dinner. As a final step, your teen and his or her date can go to a movie or dinner by themselves.

These graduated steps can be separated by as many weeks or months as you deem necessary before you allow your teen the next step.

As Nagle describes it, graduated dating helps families avoid conflicts by providing teens with some freedoms while allowing parents to retain a degree of control and influence.

Labels: parenting tips, dating, compromise

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Many experts warn of the negative effects caused by too much television. Potential issues can arise in physical, emotional, and mental health. What do you do when one parent uses the television for background noise, while the other would prefer keeping it turned off? How you raise children to keep a healthy balance between television watching and the "real world"?

"[You could] set up a 'TV room' where [your husband] can wander in and read, talk on the phone or actually put 100% attention on the TV itself, but where it was a no-kid zone. Most of the time he'd know it was there but you'd leave the TV off, and if he felt like he needed a 'fix', he could get it easily and with minimal disruptions."

Also consider what's playing on television. If one of you needs the 'background noise' consider playing meditative DVD's or even the radio. Regardless of the solution, it's important to keep the lines of communication open, so both of you can freely discuss your thoughts and feelings and find a compromise that's mutually acceptable.

Labels: tv, communication, compromise

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Contributing writer Gregory Ramey of the Dayton Daily News tells the story of a father who's counting the days until his daughter leaves for college. The dad has gone so far to keep a secret calendar on which he marks each day and feels a sense of hope in knowing that he's one day closer to his daughter being hundreds of miles away.

"It's easy to criticize what this dad is doing, but listening to his stories leads more to understanding and sympathy than to censure. Parenting is tough, and raising some kids is particularly demanding... How do you live with a child that you love, but don't really like?"

It's a hard question that leaves the parents who ask it feeling guilty and sometimes selfish. But kids with strong personalities can be a drain on the whole family if parents don't have some help figuring things out. Ramey goes on to offer some suggestions like "find some common ground" and "accept your limitations".

Labels: communication, compromise, relationships

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