The average college student connects to a parent via cellphone or internet 13 times a week, and 17 times a week after they leave college, according to Professor Barbara Hofer. Almost one in five email their college papers for their parent's approval before they turn them in for a grade.
Dr. Hofer, a professor at Middlebury College and the author of a new book, The iConnected Parent, believes that unlimited phone minutes plans and the constant availability of the Internet changed the way parents relate to their children in late adolescence.
"So much has changed just a few years ago," she said. "When you think about what happened when kids went away to college - they called home maybe once a week. What I started observing was that kids were walking out of class, flipping up their cell phones and rather than calling their friends, they were calling Mom and Dad to say, 'I got a C on the calculus test' or 'Wait until you hear what happened with my roommate last night."
Her research indicated that those students who talk to their parents the most are also the least autonomous and least likely to make decisions on their own.
"'Do I boil the water before I put the spaghetti in? How do I separate laundry?' -- whatever it might be, the parents are live and available for this kind of consultation," she said. "It's not just about letting go, which is what parents have been told to do. It's about letting go while staying connected and how to stay connected in healthy ways."
Her research indicates that the young adults who are more independent of their parents have higher grades, procrastinate less, enjoy college life more, and have better relationships with their parents.
Labels: technology, parental influence, communication
Posted By: Jane St. Clair 1 Comment