News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

Watching television is not educational for children under 3 years old, according to a study in the journal Pediatrics.

Marie Schmidt and her colleagues at Children's Hospital Boston studied 900 children at birth, six months, and then at 3 years old. Parents filled out questionnaires about the children's television watching at those intervals. After factoring out maternal age, income, education, marital status, breastfeeding, and siblings, Schmidt concluded that television watching did not improve vocabulary or visual motor abilities in children under 3.

Labels: education, tv

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Having children means having worry, anxiety, and stress. But it also means having good moments that should be enjoyed.

"Sometimes it happens when I take a few extra minutes to watch them walk into their school after I drop them off, or when I pause at their bedroom doorway to watch them play before I announce my presence... It's important to take the time to experience these brief, heartwarming moments."

Though these moments can be short-lived, they are often the moments that help ease stress and worry, and that keep us on track and focused on family. Source: Bay Area News Group (California)

Labels: stress, anxiety, memories

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A study by the American Automobile Association found that two-thirds of teens killed in traffic accidents in Florida were passengers in cars, not drivers.

Researchers examined state statistics from 1998 to 2007. Of the 1,756 people ages 15 to 17 killed in car crashes, 1,239 were passengers and 517 were drivers. About 38% of the accidents were alcohol-related.

Labels: driving, safety

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A study of teens and their iPods found that playing the gadgets too loudly can cause permanent hearing loss, and that most teens play them too loudly.

Audiologist Cory Portnuff of the University of Colorado said that teens assume it is safe to play these devices at full volume. However, his study found that playing iPods at 80% volume for 90 minutes a day is safe, or 70% volume for four hours a day. Just five minutes or so at full volume can damage hearing.

Labels: health

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A poll conducted by Junior Achievement and Deloitte found some alarming contradictions in the way teens behave now, and their perceived preparedness to maintain ethical standards when they join the workforce.

"Eighty percent of teens either somewhat or strongly agree that they are prepared to make ethical business decisions when they join the workforce, yet more than a third (38 percent) think that you have to break the rules at school to succeed."

Similar contradictions were found in their views on lying, violence, and accountability. Source: PR Newswire

Labels: behavior, morals, ethics

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As a child nears legal driving age, there are many options for learning how to drive: professional driving school, on-line classes, a book, or mom and dad. The do-it-yourself option appeals to a lot of parents.

"Many parents have opted to take on the responsibility of teaching their own teen to drive, and the reasons for doing it can be as varied as the families themselves. Besides scheduling, many parents find the cost of local driving schools prohibitive."

Driving schools can cost hundreds of dollars, which is not a reasonable expense for some families. Parents who have taught their children advise adapting your approach to suit the learning styles of the young driver. Source: Abilene (TX) Reporter-News

Labels: driving, parents, teaching

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In this age of technology, parents are being given more tools to keep track of their teenagers' activities. Today, parents can monitor everything from driving habits to deleted text messages. You can find out what websites your child frequents, and read his email.

"This is where the area gets a little grayer... Where, exactly do we draw the line? Isn't reading a teen's e-mails and texts as much a violation of privacy as opening a personal letter or eavesdropping on a phone call? Is a paper diary with a lock and key the only sacred private space these days?"

These are tough questions that require answers. In the quest to keep our kids safe, are we going too far? Ultimately, each family has to find the right balance between security and freedom; between trust and protection. Source: The Daily Star (New York)

Labels: safety, technology, privacy

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Kori, a Colorado mom, just watched her 16-year-old daughter go on her first real date. The experience sparked memories of her own teenage years, and raised concerns about her ability to help daughter navigate these tricky waters.

"I have no road map for this, the beginning of dating. I have absolutely NO real life experiences, no good example of parenting a teenaged girl to follow. I don't even know what is and isn't acceptable. I know what things I hope my daughter has learned [and] I know what things we have talked about as she has grown and matured, but what I don't know is how to stand back and watch and let her life unfold."

So she watches, paying close attention to what her daughter says to and about her new boyfriend. She watches for red flags, but does her best to let her daughter make her own choices. Now past the point of carrying her daughter through life, she's learning to step back and simply be available to catch her if she falls. Source: The Sacramento (Calif.) Bee

Labels: dating, relationships, boundaries

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There seems to be increasing concern among parents about teenage, co-ed sleepovers. They are more common now than ever before, and many parents are unsure how to respond.

"Experts say there's a quick way for parents to solve these and other sleepover dilemmas: Examine your values and do what makes you most comfortable. And if that means giving a big, fat 'no' to any co-ed sleepover arrangement, feel free to ignore the ensuing arguments, emotional blackmail and whining..."

Ultimately, the parent is still the parent and doesn't have to agree to anything she doesn't feel is in the best interest of her child. Source: Cowichan Valley Citizen (British Columbia, Canada)

Labels: sex, values, involment

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You and your teenager are in the doctor's office for a check-up, and it happens: The doctor asks you to leave so she and your teen can talk privately. It's an anxious moment for some parents, and many worry that their child may be in real trouble and only the doctor knows for sure.

"... if your kid was suicidal, or a heroin addict, and somehow you didn't know it, would the doctor tell you? Turns out the answer is yes. 'If we are concerned that someone is in danger, we are compelled to share that information,' said Dr. Joseph Hagan..."

Hagan goes on to say that speaking privately with a teenager is not about secrecy, but about helping the teen develop autonomy. Teenagers need to learn how to ask questions about their health. A good pediatrician will not only encourage autonomy, but will help teenagers talk to their parents about awkward topics like sex or alcohol. Source: The Associated Press

Labels: communication, doctors

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Maryland lawmakers have put forth a proposal aimed at protecting teens and tweens from dating violence. Statistics show that one in four teenagers will find themselves in an abusive relationship.

"The bill would require every middle and high school in Maryland to teach students about dating violence and expand the current definition of a victim of domestic violence to include dating relationships."

Several people testified in favor of the bill during a hearing at the State House of Representatives, including Bill and Michelle Mitchell, whose daughter was stabbed to death three years ago by her boyfriend. There's currently no indication as to when state lawmakers will vote on the bill. Source: WBAL-TV (Baltimore)

Labels: violence, dating, abuse

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New research has confirmed that teenagers whose parents smoke are more likely to start smoking.

"The effect was particularly strong if young people were exposed to a parent's tobacco use before their teen years, Dr. Stephen E. Gilman of the Harvard School of Public Health in Boston and his colleagues found. But they also found that in children of ex-smokers 'that risk goes away if parents quit,' Gilman explained in an interview."

The study also found that while each parent independently influenced the likelihood that a teenager would smoke, mothers influenced both sons and daughters equally, while fathers had more influence over sons. Source: Reuters

Labels: influences, smoking

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The teenage years can be confusing both for teenagers and their parents. But even during these trying times, you can still nurture your teen and encourage responsible behavior.

"One of the most important parenting tips for teens involves positive attention. Spend time with your teen to remind him or her that you care. Listen to your teen when he or she talks, and respect your teen's feelings."

Also, don't pressure your child to be like you. Instead, encourage him to discover his own identity. If, however, his "discovery" begins to move him toward unhealthy friendships and activities, be there to sound the alarm and set reasonable limits and boundaries.Source: The Mayo Clinic

Labels: behavior, responsibility, consequences

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As a parent, you do your best to raise your kids well, and instill in them the ability to make good, healthy choices. As her own son heads off to high school, where the rules differ greatly from those of elementary and middle school, writer Yvonne Zick wonders if she's done enough.

"Suddenly, I no longer feel like the expert. Instead I am the mother who questions if I have done enough to give my son the tools he needs to not only survive his teenage years, but to thrive in thoughtful choices, make important mistakes and begin the exhilarating process of designing his own life."

While she and her husband have done their best to set boundaries, and good examples, they know mistakes will happen. But they're trusting that the "guardrails" they've established will help their son navigate these tumultuous years. Source: Vashon (WA) Beachcomber

Labels: support, decisions

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There aren't many of them out there, maybe one in every neighborhood: a house where teens feel comfortable congregating and hanging out. The parents in that house often benefit as much as the kids do.

"That pays off in the parents knowing their kids' friends, and the kids telling their parents what they're up to [Dr. Scott] Wooding says... Wooding says gaining that kind of rapport with your teenagers and their friends isn't rocket science."

Just take an interest in what's going on in their lives; ask questions and be willing to listen to the answers. Having a few extra snacks around helps, too! Source: The Calgary Herald

Labels: communication, relationships, involment

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