News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

A study of Canadian high school students found that the majority believe they could survive any kind of injury incurred during a car accident. Most also believe that they are better drivers than older people with more driving experience.

"We talk about it all the time," said Dr. Najma Ahmed, author of the study and a trauma center physician. "But they really do think they're invincible. They really think that because they're young they could survive anything and that only old people die in hospitals."

Dr. Ahmed and her colleagues surveyed 260 students 15 to 17 years old for a study published in the Journal of the American College of Surgeons.

Labels: driving, risky_behavior, safety

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More parents are participating in teen social websites like Facebook or MySpace, according to a report from MSNBC. The majority sign up to make sure their teens post only appropriate videos, pictures, and written materials, and some leave Internet reminders for their teens such as "dentist today" or "do your math homework."

However, some adults pursue their own interests on the social network sites, and others simply enjoy Internet chatting with their children and their children's friends, according to the report.

Facebook, originally designed for college students, tripled the number of its accounts in the 35- to 54-year-old age group this year. The 13- to 34-year-old group doubled in the same period, and the group over 65 grew by 150 percent.

Labels: internet, interferring, privacy

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School has started again, and the return to class is accompanied by a plethora of social activities. Most teens and tweens want to spend less time at home, and less time with their parents. But how does a parent determine just how much freedom their child is ready for?

"Behavior, not age, is the best predictor, said Asheville [North Carolina] child psychologist Dr. Jerry Coffey, who also holds local parenting workshops. 'Consider whether the child had demonstrated responsibility and good decision making in other situations,' Coffey said."

The general consensus is for parents to start slow. Let your children stay home along for short periods of time to see how they do. Go to the mall and ask them to meet you at a certain place at a certain time, as a kind of "test." Slowly increase their freedom based on their level of responsibility. Source: Asheville Citizen-Times

Labels: responsibility, independence, freedom

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As most U.S. students headed back to school, an elementary school principal in Massachusetts had the following advice for parents:

"As you know, you play a very important role in your child's education. You can assist your child in so many ways - by attending school functions/activities, helping children with homework and projects, talking to your child about what they worked on or learned in school... The possibilities are endless."

This kind of parental involvement is important for all students - even those who are in high school. Expressing your interest in your child's education and school experience can help keep the lines of communication open between you and your teen. Source: Berkshire Eagle

Labels: school, parental-involvement, positive-influences

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Teenagers need space. Adolescence is a time for exerting independence and breaking away (at least a little bit) from mom and dad. Parents can help teens feel more independent by giving them a space all their own.

"Whether it's a bedroom, study room or basement, any room in the home can be altered to suit the needs of both teens and parents... Provide plenty of storage room for their school bags, art work, sporting equipment and gadgets, which will help keep the room tidy and organized."

Consider moving the television, sound system, and video games to keep the noise in one area of the house. It's still the parent's house, so setting rules for space is fair; just keep them reasonable. Source: NewsCanada

Labels: rules, privacy, independence

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Parents of teenagers often feel frustrated in their attempts to communicate. They feel like their words are "falling on deaf ears." But there are steps parents can take to improve communication.

"Be a good listener. Be enthusiastic. Make the teen feel that their views and contributions are important... Create regular and casual communications through discussion of ideas of books, games, TV shows, etc..."

Parents can also keep lines of communication open by respecting a teen's privacy. If he or she shares something in confidence, keep it private - just between you and your child. Source: Edmond Life & Leisure (Edmond, OK)

Labels: communication, privacy, listening

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It's sort of like running into your parents at the mall when you're hanging out with all the cool kids - sort of. You go online to check your Facebook page and see that you have a "friend request," only this one is from your mom.

"Parents are flocking to social networking sites - sometimes to monitor their kids, and sometimes for the same reason teenagers signed up: to communicate and to share. For some teens, this can feel like an intrusion on their virtual space. For others, it's just a new way to stay in touch with mom and dad."

How kids respond to parents being on social networking sites depends on what the parent-teen relationship is like off-line. Parents who try to monitor their kids too much may find their strategy backfiring, and teens may block them from seeing the full truth. Source: Mexia (TX) Daily News

Labels: social-networking, facebook, interferring

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Teens push boundaries - that's no secret. And parents have the unenviable responsibility of setting firm boundaries for their teenagers as well as consequences when rules aren't followed.

"Set high standards - as you definitely know from your own life, you can only reach as high as you aim. Set expectations for your teen high, and they will at least have a chance."

Be clear about your expectations and boundaries. If they're not clear, your teen has more opportunity to find loopholes, or to unintentionally break a rule. Unclear rules can be frustrating for both teen and parents. Source: Busy Moms Online

Labels: expectations, boundaries, consequences

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No matter how open communication is, parents are often tempted to snoop into the lives of their teenagers. Whether it's reading email, reading text messages, digging through a backpack, or searching a closet, parents want to make sure teens aren't hiding evidence of risky behavior.

"Does covert sneakiness actually provide benefits beyond other risk-prevention steps? Do those benefits outweigh the negative aspects of going behind their backs? Secret snooping has a definite downside. It is dishonest. And if they find out - which they often do - kids feel betrayed."

Parents can't stop every risky behavior in which their teens might engage. But open communication and lots of questions (Where are you going? What will you be doing afterward? Who are you going with?) will go much further than snooping. Source: The Globe and Mail (UK)

Labels: parenting, privacy, boundaries

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Though summer is almost over, there's still plenty of time for teenagers to waste before heading back to school. But there are steps parents can take to keep teens active during and after summer.

"Whether you ask them to help you around the house, volunteer outside of the home, or help them get a job, you want them to be involved in something. Give them encouragement to help at the local recreation center, children's program, or nursing home. They may find they truly enjoy thinking of others first."

Parents will have more success getting kids off the couch if they plan activities the family can do together. Source: Busy Moms Online

Labels: volunteers, jobs, laziness

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In an ideal world, kids would always have their own rooms. But ours is not an ideal world, and sharing is often necessary. For younger kids, sharing a room may not be an issue, but room-sharing can cause a lot of stress (and arguments) for teenagers.

"Teenagers who share a room may feel the right to borrow or use their sibling's things without permission whenever the mood strikes... Assert your parental authority and set clear rules in place about borrowing and taking each other's clothes, CDs and sports equipment without permission."

Also, try setting a schedule which allows each child to spend some time alone in the room. This will give them each a greater sense of privacy and may reduce some of the arguments about "personal space." Source: Associated Content

Labels: siblings, sharing

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Peer pressure is a part of life for teenagers and adults. But because teens are trying to develop their sense of self, they are far more influenced by both positive and negative peer pressure.

"As a parent, you can help your child overcome such negative peer pressure. Step one is to help build your teen's self-confidence and positive self-image. Your goal is to lessen criticism while looking for positive accomplishments and chances to praise jobs well done."

Take a genuine interest in your teen's life. Do more than just ask what he's interested in - ask why. Strong family relationships will help teenagers resist negative peer pressure, so create a schedule that allows family members to spend time together eating dinner, playing games, and really getting to know each other. Source: American Counseling Association

Labels: influences, peer_pressure, self-esteem

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Parents of teens may have heard the term "emo." Your teenager may even be one - an adolescent sub-group distinguishable by its dark clothes, wispy-flop hair styles, and sweatbands on the wrist. The modern trend is not that far removed from the 1980s "emotional" trend.

"But modern emo is something quite different. It mixed dress elements from goth and punk with splashes of color and cutesy graphics drawn more from Japanese street culture. The music became poppier, more targeted at young MTV viewers. In 2006, it finally became a clear mainstream phenomenon..."

But today, many say that the emo trend is on its way out. The news is relief for many parents who didn't know how seriously they should take the depressed moods, the dark clothing, and the sad music. Though most of the emo trend has been exactly that - a trend - it's not a bad idea for parents to evaluate if their teens are truly feeling depressed and hopeless. For some, emo has been a trend; for others it's a reality. Source: The Press (New Zealand)

Horrified by what your teen wears? Read I Can't Believe that Outfit!

Labels: influences, clothing, trends

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