News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

Stress at home affects teens' lives at school, and stress at school carries over into their family lives, according to a new study from the University of California, Los Angeles.

Dr. Lisa Flook and her colleagues studied 503 teenagers in the ninth through twelfth grades. Those who experienced higher levels of family stress in their freshman years had poorer academic records by senior year. Students with higher levels of academic problems in ninth grade experienced greater family stress in twelfth grade.

"The two-directional process of spillover between family and school identified here suggests that reducing stress in the family may have benefits for adolescents' school adjustment and vice versa," Dr. Flook wrote in the journal Child Development.

Labels: families, school, stress

Teen text talk is a "renaissance" of language that fascinates linguists, according to a new study in American Speech.

Dr. Sali Tagliamonte and her colleagues went through millions of words online and found that text talk is a mixture of formal language and slang. Teens use many abbreviations such as TMW for tomorrow, OMG for Oh My Gosh, and the popular LOL for Laughter on Line. They also use rebus or combinations of letters and numbers such as GR8 and SK8R, as well as pictures from characters such as :).

Dr. Tagliamonte said the new language is more formal than adults may believe. For example, teens type "I shall" and "I must" in text talk, but they use "I'll" and "I gotta" in oral speech. One of her favorite examples of teen text is "We shall rock some serious jam."

Labels: communication, text_messaging

When a driver is newly licensed, he or she is by definition inexperienced. However, only 15% of teens believe their friends are inexperienced drivers, according to a survey from the Center for Injury Research and Prevention at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia.

Over 85% of the 5,665 high school students in the survey said their friends were experienced drivers, even though "everyone they are driving with is virtually inexperienced," said lead researcher Dr. Kenneth R. Ginsburg.

Although having passengers in the car or using cell phones while driving increase the chance of an accident, very few teens in the survey recognized these dangers. Two-thirds said they usually travel with others in the car and a majority thought it was okay to talk on the phone while driving. This study appears in Pediatrics.

If you think programs for troubled teens would benefit your teenager, then visit AspenRanch.com to learn more about their program for troubled teens.

Labels: driving, risky_behavior, safety

Teens who live in big cities like Chicago and New York are less likely to die in car accidents than their peers who live in smaller cities or rural areas, according to a new report from Allstate Insurance Company.

About 6,000 American teenagers die in car crashes every year. The number one cause of teen fatalities is driver error and not alcohol, as most people may believe.

Fatal car crashes for teens in rural areas are double those in cities and suburbs.

The most deadly areas for car crashes are the Tampa area in Florida; Orlando, FL; Jacksonville, FL; Nashville, TN; Phoenix, AZ; Kansas City, MO; and Atlanta, GA. The cities with the fewest teen car deaths are San Francisco/Oakland, CA; San Jose, CA; New York City; Los Angeles, CA; Cleveland, OH; Milwaukee, WI; Boston, MS; Portland, OR; Salt Lake City, UT; and Chicago, IL.

Labels: driving, safety, teenagers

The newest buzz in the parenting world is about "parenting coaches"; counselors who specialize in helping parents be parents. A parenting coach offers support and advice for moms and dads who feel overwhelmed and need an outside perspective.

"Like personalized Dr. Spocks, parent coaches are available for one-hour office visits, lunchtime phone calls, even comforting e-mail exchanges. They offer practical tips on how to get through thumb-sucking, sibling rivalry and other day-today trials. And they make parents feel better about themselves."

While some critics warn that parent coaches can't offer a quick fix, moms and dads like knowing there's someone they can call for help when "because I said so" doesn't work anymore. Source: Miami Herald.

Labels: advice, counseling, parenting_coaches

Parenting isn't easy for anyone - not the married couple, the single parent, or the blended family. Experts tell parents to watch for signs like mood swings, changes in social circles, a sudden drop in grades that indicate a teen may be headed down the wrong path. But parents have another, often unused advocate for their kids - each other.

"Parents need to stick together. Over the years, I've had people come to me with concerns about my girls. They tell me something they had seen or heard, and they share concerns about people they may have seen one of my girls with and wanted to make me aware of it. I appreciate when people share with me."

Parents can and should be allies, working together to guide their kids toward bright, healthy futures. Rather than judging, pointing fingers, or worse yet ignoring each other, parents can offer each other much needed support and encouragement, and be an extra set of eyes and hears. Source: Havelock News

A therapeutic boarding school can help teens and their families work through their issues and strengthen their relationships.

Labels: support, warning_signs

As parents invest time and energy into trying to understand their teenage kids, it might help them to know that their teenagers are trying to understand them, too. In her first book, "How to Raise Your Parents: A Teen Girl's Survival Guide", author Sarah O'Leary tries to shed some light on the subject.

"The teen survival guide is full of straight talk and smart advice on dealing with the 'difficult years' that every teen girl experiences. The guide covers everything from negotiation and bargaining tactics to surviving the report card storm."

O'Leary's book is helpful for both teens and parents, aiding each in understanding the other, and keeping lines of communication open. Source: Bellevue Reporter

If teen is struggling with who they are, then a wilderness therapy program can help. Visit Wilderness-Programs-Info.com to learn more.

Labels: communication, parenting, relationships

Setting rules and establishing boundaries is part of being a parent. Breaking rules and pushing boundaries is often part of being a teenager. Finding common ground between two people whose goals are so diametrically opposed can be tricky, but it can be done - in the context of a healthy relationship.

"Rules without relationship are generally crafted for selfish, egocentric and unloving reasons. The goal is control, personal convenience, and power. These types of rules not only have no relationship - they actually stifle it!"

Parents need to be careful about setting rules simply because it makes their lives easier. Rules need to be set that benefit the child. This type of rule-setting makes it easier to establish and maintain a healthy parent-child relationship. Source: Carlsbad Current Argus

Labels: communication, relationships, rules

This story, and others like it, is becoming common: A parent complains that his daughter only wants the most expensive of everything - clothes, glasses, cell phones. There's little gratitude for the parents' willingness to pay for these things, only an ongoing demand for them. What's a parent to do?

"Any teen who really - and I mean really - wanted $325 spectacles [or a Sony Playstation] ought to be able to pay half. I make the same proposition regarding school-age children who want to start wearing contact lenses. One of the most predictable indicators of personal responsibility is financial commitment. A child who has invested their own money towards the purchase of contact lenses will take very good care of them - not so if merely given them."

Challenge your teen to find the clothes, glasses, or cell phone she wants online, at a discount. Most web-savvy teens can do that. The requirement to pay half still stands, but you'll both be paying half of less. Source: WebMD

If your teen or tween daughter is behaving badly, learn how all girls schools can help. With campuses in North Carolina and Oregon, New Leaf Academy helps middle school aged girls get a grip on their issues before they reach high school.

Labels: media_infuences, responsibility, teen_culture

The entertainment industry doesn't make life easy for parents with teenagers. From Jamie Lynn Spears to Miley Ray Cyrus, kids are inundated with sexual messages, not to mention the peer pressure they face to become sexually active at a young age.

"Although your kids may want to be like Hannah Montana, a recent National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy survey offered statistics providing hope that you are still the most influential role model in your child's life when it comes to sex. Research shows that regular discussions about sex with your child can delay the onset of his or her sexual activity and improve the parent-child relationship."

It takes a little courage, but talk to your kids about current events. Find out what they think of Jamie Lynn Spears' teen pregnancy, or Miley Ray Cyrus' recent racy photos. Talk about the consequences these girls face, or could face, as a result of their decisions. Give your teenager the opportunity to share her opinion and ask questions. Source: Mississippi Clarion Ledger

The Academy at Swift River helps troubled teens and their families build better relathionships. Learn more at SwiftRiver.com.

Labels: communication, pregnancy, relationships

Teenagers love to talk. They talk on the phone, online, at school, but often get quiet when parents are around. Consequently, parents feel they don't know or understand what's happening in their kids' lives. A quick chat with someone from a teen helpline revealed the 5 most common topics teens want to talk about.

"1) Relationships. Teens frequently want to talk to other teens about relationships with parents, siblings, friends and teachers. This is a broad topic I know, but interactions, building relationships and friendships are extremely important to teenagers."

The remaining top five topics were: abuse, sex, drugs and alcohol, and suicide. Source: BlogHer.com

If you feel your child is headed down the wrong path, correct their course sooner rather than later. Turn-About Ranch is a short term, high impact program for troubled teens that emphasizes old fashioned values like hard work and honesty.

Labels: commitment, relationships, worries

It used to be that parents worried about what their kids were doing on their computers. Now, many parents are beginning to wonder what their kids are doing on their cell phones. Now that most cell phones offer Internet access, the Web is available just about everywhere.

"Among teens, there is a strong demand for text messaging and email on cell phones. Now they want additional features, too, says Chris Collins, a senior analyst with Yankee Group. In a survey, 26% of teens said that having Internet access was a must-have feature for the next phone they bought..."

Many cell phone carriers offer options that allow parents to control how much access kids have to the Internet. Some service plans enable parents to block certain types of websites, or block Internet access altogether. Source: The Wall Street Journal

Worried that your teen is becoming addicted to the Internet? Check out Video-Game-Addiction.org to learn more.

Labels: cell_phones, internet, safety

Amid all the "To Catch a Predator" shows and studies, parents often feel panicked at the idea of their teenage kids having profiles on websites like MySpace or Facebook. But recent research has found that most kids have a positive experience - especially the shy ones.

"Being social, the purpose of the [MySpace] site, is crucial to developing an identity. Adolescents adjust their behavior - and images - to positive and negative interactions with their peers. Rosen writes in his book that social flops, which can crush kids' self-confidence, are easier to shrug off, and social successes are easier to achieve on MySpace."

Larry D. Rosen's book Me, MySpace, and I goes on to say that many kids learn through social networking sites that talking and getting to know people isn't really that hard after all. Positive experiences can help build their self-esteem and make even socially awkward kids realize they know how to socialize and make friends. Source: MSNBC

It's important for parents to find a balance between the positives of online social networking and becoming addicted to the internet. Learn more about internet addiction at Video Game Addiction.org.

Labels: myspace, self-esteem, social_pressure

It's not a new trend; acronyms like SOS and ASAP have been used for decades. But the latest generation of tweens (pre-teens) has their own set of abbreviations that leaves many adults scratching their heads.

"It has evolved into a spoken language among young teens and middle school students, who use acronyms to speak to their friends in shorthand, save a little time or tell off-color jokes in front of confused parents..."

This new age of acronyms was born out of instant and text messaging, using shortcuts like LOL ("laugh out loud") and IDK ("I don't know") that were initially only written. Though parents may feel confused and a little frustrated, most linguists offer a word of encouragement: It's only a trend, and it won't last long. Source: The Emerald Coast (Florida)

Not up on the latest text lingo? Learn how to "Text Your Teen 4 Better Communication".

Labels: cell_phones, communication, technology

High school students do not understand how to handle basic money issues, such as calculating APRs or investing for the highest returns. Fewer than half of high school students who took a financial literacy test from the JumpStart Coalition on Financial Literacy passed it. This was the lowest result in six years of testing.

Bernard Bernanke, chairman of the Federal Reserve, commented on the results, saying "the financial preparedness of our nation's youth is essential to their well-being and of vital important to our economic future."

College prep boarding schools might be better equipped to teach teens about money and finances, which will only make them better prepared for the future. Find a college prep boarding school at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com.

Labels: education, money, responsibility

Are parents harder on first-born children than their younger siblings? A new study indicates the answer may be yes.

Researchers from the University of Maryland, Duke University, and Johns Hopkins University sorted through data from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics on teen pregnancy and high school drop-outs. The researchers found that parents were more likely to withdraw financial support from first-borns who got pregnant or quit high school than their younger siblings. Parents were more likely to allow the younger brothers or sisters to live at home. Younger siblings were also more likely to drop out of school and get pregnant compared to the first-borns in the study.

Lead author Ginger Zhe Jim believes that most parents want to take a tough stand and set an example of their first-borns who get in trouble in order to deter the younger ones from following suit.

This study appears in Economic Journal.

What happens to the younger siblings of a teen struggling with drug addiction? Learn about how to parent your other children while getting your child help for teen alcoholism.

Labels: parenting, rules, siblings

Philosophy is now the "hot" major for college students.

Enrollments in philosophy departments have more than doubled over the past two years at schools like Reuters, University of Massachusetts at Amherst, Notre Dame, Texas A&M, University of Pittsburgh, and City University of New York.

David Schrader, director of the American Philosophical Association, noted that demand for courses is outpacing resources at some colleges. "Philosophy is a major that helps students become quick learners," he said, "and gives them strong skills in writing, analysis and critical thinking."

One student noted another added benefit of majoring in philosophy: "The whole deep existential torment thing - it's good for getting girls."

Will your local public school be able to prepare your teen for college? If you're not sure, then you may want to think about a private boarding school. Find a private college prep boarding school at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com.

Labels: classes, college, trends

According to a survey conducted by Samsung Mobile, nearly half of all parents use text messaging to communicate with their teenagers. Most of those parents also said that text messaging improved their overall relationships with their teens.

"There is no doubt that cell phones are creating new ways for parents to connect with... teens... That is a very good thing."

And while text messaging can be a great tool, open communication is necessary in any format that works: telephone, face-to-face, over ice cream. The "art of parenting" has been around far longer than cell phones, and requires both the use of the latest technology and reliance on standard forms of communication. Source: Switched.com.

If your teen isn't communicating with you and believe he or she is engaging in risky behaviors, then a therapeutic boarding school may help. Learn more about Aspen Ranch and their animal assisted therapy program.

Labels: cell_phones, communication, text_messaging

Because of the developmental stage most teenagers are in, they have a hard time managing their emotions; especially if they're provoked. As parents, we can sometimes provoke our kids unintentionally, and author Mark Gregston reminds us that we need to be careful.

"I'm not talking about momentary parental lapses here. If you are going through a struggle with your teenager right now, I guarantee there will be moments when you will not handle matters well. Even the best parent may 'lose it' every now and then. Instead, I'm referring to a parent who has an ongoing problem losing it... of punishing and demeaning a child with destructive or negative words, who may or may not recognize it..."

Teenagers who are continually berated by parents often end up angry and bitter, and they show little or no respect for their parents. Parents must be aware of how they're communicating with their kids, making sure that - even when they're angry - they're not being cruel or unfair. Source: KBIQ Radio

If your teenager exhibits signs of anger and aggression, get him the help he needs before he gets into too much trouble. A licensed, accredited residential treatment program, like the one at Turn-About Ranch, teaches troubled teens real values like honesty and respect. Visit www.TurnAboutRanch.com to learn more.

Labels: aggression, fighting, parenting

Yet another university study links a drop in the use of antidepressant medications to an increase in teen suicides. This time, Canadian scientists at the University of Manitoba found that teen suicides climbed 25% after the appearance of new warnings against the use of such drugs among teens and children.

"We are concerned that the way things are communicated may have unintended consequences," said psychiatrist Dr. Laurence Katz, whose study appears in the Canadian Medical Association Journal.

He also pointed to another Canadian study, this one from Kinank Child and Family Services that revealed that 38% of parents are too embarrassed to admit that their teen may need treatment for anxiety or depression.

Labels: anti-depression_medications, mental_health, suicide