News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

Disappointment is part of life. You teen will feel disappointed about friendships, test scores, tryouts for plays and sports teams; she'll even feel disappointed with you on occasion. You can model responses that help your teen learn to handle disappointment.

"Express your own sadness when it is appropriate, and try to stay firmly on your kid’s side, even if she decides to be angry with you instead of the circumstance. Modeling the appropriate expression of feelings – by talking about them without using every bad word you know, by crying if you feel like it, by going for a walk or hard run, all demonstrate difference coping options for your child."

Watch the way your teen reacts to disappointment. What would be a mild disappointment to you can be devastating to an adolescent. Watch for signs of depression and - without pestering – ask your child how he's feeling. Read more at PoughKeepsieJournal.com.

Labels: communication, influences, role_models

The old saying "you are the company you keep" is true; even (or maybe especially) for teenagers. Most adults can look back on poor decisions they made as teenagers and point to a classmate, girl - or boyfriend who influenced them to make those decisions. Teenagers today are no different, and parents need to be aware of who their kids are spending time with.

"If your children are ditching school, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, lying, engaging in sexual activity or doing other things that cause you to worry, you can bet their decisions can be traced back to their friends."

Take time getting to know your teenager. He or she may try to shut you out at first, but be persistent (not pushy... persistent). The better you know your kids, the more quickly you'll notice behavior that's uncharacteristic. Consider having family movie nights, mandatory family dinners, and other activities that will give you adequate time to know your child and ample opportunities to offer the wisdom and guidance he or she needs. Read more at CleburneTimesReview.com.

Labels: communication, influences, role_models

The common school of thought for parenting teenagers is that adolescence is a time for parents to let go; to set fewer rules and have fewer boundaries. While the teen years are a critical time for people to begin learning more about personal responsibility, it's a season of life that still requires a lot of parental participation.

“AHEAD joins SAMHSA and its experts in asserting that rules are even more important when kids get older because they need to know exactly what their boundaries and expectations are... Clear rules are especially important when it comes to drugs and alcohol. Research shows that young people are less likely to use tobacco, alcohol, and illicit drugs if their parents set rules about not doing so."

Parents need to set clear rules and consistently enforce them, which includes being consistent about consequences when rules are broken. Read more at JournalReview.com.

If you teen is struggling with drug use and addiction, visit DrugRehabTreatment.com to learn more about how you can help and find a residential drug treatment center.

Labels: boundaries, dependence, rules

One of the greatest parenting challenges is finding the balance between treating each child fairly while addressing the unique needs of each child. Tailoring your parenting style to each child can cause them to feel that one child is getting preferential treatment, which can cause a lot of tension in the home.

"But if children recognize the different behavior as being warranted, there's no negative effect on family relationships. Siblings who have a shared understanding of why parents treat them differently actually get along better, Prof. [Laurie] Kramer says."

For example, a child who's independent may not require as much attention and guidance as one who's more shy or needy. But the independent child is still going to wonder why the other child is getting more attention. Explaining your actions is the best way to ensure that your children understand, and is the best way to reduce the chances of one child feeling jealous or less valued. Read more at TheGlobeandMail.com.

Labels: feelings, parenting_styles, relationships

Most people today struggle to keep a healthy balance between work and family. It used to be challenge reserved for single parents, but today even those who have a spouse or significant other find themselves running short on time.

"Many parents struggle with tensions between work and family. Parents say job demands are the #1 thing that makes parenting difficult, according to Search Institute surveys. Two-thirds of parents surveyed by Public Agenda, a national opinion research company, say they worry some or a lot about juggling the demands of work and family."

The Search Institute suggests that parents use the principles outlined in its Developmental Assets framework to better manage the tension between family and work. Principles include setting values and priorities, having the whole family work on chores together, and setting aside specific time to spend with family members. Read more at MVParents.com.

The best boarding schools can make all the difference in a child's future. Find the best boarding schools at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com.

Labels: families, tension, working

More teen drivers are injured and killed between June and September than during the remaining months of the year. There are many factors that play into this statistic and many things parents can do to keep their teens safe.

"It appears that old-fashioned parenting is waning especially with a host of new products that help parents keep tabs on their children, including one-touch phones and even electronic tags that can be sewn into clothing. However, remember that eyes, ears and plain old attention and accountability go a long way in keeping tabs on your children."

Studies have shown that parents who set strict rules and consequences for their teen drivers significantly reduce risky driving behavior such as speeding, and adjusting the radio or CD player while driving. Read more at WacoTrib.com.

Labels: driving, risky_behavior, safety

The Anti-Defamation League of Philadelphia recently sponsored a program called "Trickery, Trolling and Threats: Understanding and Addressing Cyberbullying." The focus was on not only identifying cyberbullying, but giving parents and young people ideas and tools to use in response.

"Cyberbullying is defined as 'willful and repeated harm through electronic media,' explained [Randi] Boyette, assistant regional director for the ADL in Eastern Pennsylvania and Delaware. 'The impact is not one incident, the impact is magnified' because of the immediate and widespread nature of e-mail and mobile phones."

Cyberbullying often goes unreported because young people don't want to have computers and phones taken away or be forced to delete accounts from on-line social networking sites like MySpace. Recent studies have also shown that, though boys have traditionally been more likely to be bullies, there are increasing incidents of girls bullying each other. Read more at JewishExponent.com.

Learn more ways to help your troubled teen by reading our articles for parents of troubled teens. Find more articles about bullying and other issues today's teens face.

Labels: cell_phones, cyberbulling, email, teens

Some parents, in an attempt to protect their teens from making poor decisions, will resort to checking out their MySpace pages, listening in on conversations, and possibly even reading their diaries or journals. But what is this kind of behavior teaching the kids?

"A mentor and author of My Feet Aren't Ugly: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out (Beaufort Books), [Debra] Beck believes that parents today need to reassess how they're approaching parenting. According to Beck, 'Too often, parents inadvertently give their [kids] mixed messages. By sneaking around and looking at a teen's MySpace page, listening in on private conversations and snooping, parents are teaching that honoring someone's privacy isn't that big of a deal.'"

Open lines of communication can be difficult, but are vital during your child's teenage years. Talk to your child, not at her. This will give you the opportunity to discuss important issues like drinking, without pushing her away. Read more online.

Labels: parenting, privacy, role_models

With seven kids ranging in age from 26 years to 18 months old, Barbara Cox has had her share of experience navigating the tumultuous teenage years. Though several of her children have made it through that difficult time and are now adults, she says each situation was a little different - forcing her to adapt her parenting style.

"Oldest daughter Melissa sometimes cried or yelled during disagreements, saying things that hurt Cox's feelings. Second child Nick was quieter and began spreading his wings earlier than his sister had. Matt came next and often liked to say things simply for shock value."

With each child, Barbara learned something new. She's learned how to communicate and really listen to her kids, and how to include them in decisions about things like curfews and consequences. Read more at TheOlympian.com.

Boarding and residential schools can help for parents who feel overwhelmed and want the best education for their child. Boarding high schools can help teens learn new skills and grow emotionally and academically. Learn more about residential boarding schools at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com.

Labels: mothers, parenting_styles, parenting_tips

Jeff Herring is a marriage and family therapist who specializes in working with teens and their parents. He’s put together his "10 Universal Laws for Parents of Teens" as a way to offer parents some guidance and support.

"1. Law of Belonging: The greatest need of teenagers (after music and the phone) is a strong sense of belonging. They need to feel they are a part of something bigger than themselves. If they don’t get it in a healthy place - with family, worthwhile friends, clubs, sports, youth groups, etc. - they will get it in an unhealthy place - with inappropriate friends, drugs, gangs, or cults."

Other laws include the "Law of Management", and the "Law of Modeling". Read more at ParentingIdeas.org.

Teen drug and alcohol abuse can be a scary time that affects an entire family. At Adolescent-Substance-Abuse.com you can find information about the types of teen drug use and about teenage drug addiction. Teen-Help-Directory.com offers more information about teenage drug abuse and list teen drug rehabs.

Labels: guidance, parenting_tips, support

Staying up late and getting up early seems to be a rite of passage for teenagers. But most scientists and those in the medical community agree that adolescents actually need more sleep, not less. Ideally, teens should get eight to ten hours of sleep a night. But if they have to get up at 6:30am for school, that means they should be in bed by 9:30 or 10pm at the latest. Not likely, right?

"What can a parent do to help their teen stay rested? It seems the ideal scenario would be to allow your teen to do nothing - as if! Instead, help your teen take a look at his or her schedule and see how sleep can be fit in to cut down on incidence of sleep deprivation. Since energy levels usually dim in the afternoon, instead of coming home and plopping down on the computer for an hour to "chat" with friends, encourage your teenager to put up an away message and take a nap."

Though you may not set a strict bedtime for your teen, consider having a "room curfew" that requires your teen to be in his or her room at a certain time. Encourage quite activities (no TV, video games, or computers) after a certain time of night to help your teen begin to wind down.

Read more at TeenagersToday.com.

The best high school boarding schools can be found at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com. Private boarding schools, military boarding schools, and other residential schools are all listed at BoardingSchoolsInfo.com.

Labels: curfews, sleep_deprivation, teenagers

Depending on the type of damage to a certain gene, a person may develop either depression or schizophrenia, according to new research from an international group of scholars from Great Britain, Canada and Japan.

Researchers studied mice with two types of damage to a gene known as DISC1. This gene plays a key role in learning, memory and mood. Depending on the kind of damage to this gene, mice responded more positively to drug treatments used to treat schizophrenia or depression.

Dr. David Porteous of the University of Edinburgh said, "While the causes of schizophrenia, bipolar affective disorder and major depression are unknown, all evidence points to subtle differences in the way the brain develops and to chemical changes in the brain. Our work identified the DISC1 gene as an important risk factor in these types of mental diseases."

Dr. Porteous and others in Great Britain are working with scientists from Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto, Canada and RIKEN institute in Japan to help pinpoint which patients will respond best to which specific treatments.

Labels: depression, research, schizophrenia