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News, Advice, and Tips for Parenting Teenagers

The By Parents For Parents Blog is regularly updated with the latest news and information on topics that relate to parenting teenagers. We'll post parenting advice and tips from trusted online news sources and expert parenting columns.

We invite you to add your comments. Please let us know if you would like some specific topics covered, want to share your experience as a parent dealing with teens, or just have general feedback on the By Parents For Parents Blog.

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Prom Season Safety

Underage drinking is one of the biggest problems faced by teens today, according to a recent Gallup survey sponsored by Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD), and if you don't already communicate regularly with your teen about the inherent dangers of alcohol misuse, prom season creates an ideal opportunity.

Short of personally accompanying your teen to the prom (a tactic that probably won't go over too well), however, thinking that you can keep your teen 100% safe on prom night or on any other night isn't realistic. Fortunately, keeping your teen as safe as possible is.

Even if you feel certain your teen is "too smart" or "too sensible" to engage in risky behaviors like alchohol or substance misuse, the pressures and expectations of prom night can put almost any teen into an uncomfortable -- or dangerous -- situation. And if you already suspect that your teen may have a drinking problem, prom night parties can present an all too easy opportunity to get into trouble.

So what can you do to help keep your teen safe on prom night? First and foremost, communicate: it's critical that you talk openly with your teen about your concerns -- and about the things your teen can do to take care of him/herself. Be absolutely clear about the dangers of drinking and driving or of letting a friend drive drunk (according to MADD, "nearly half of all 15-20 year olds killed in car crashes during prom season in 2004 involved alcohol") and make sure your teen understands that under no circumstances do they have to get into a car with anyone they think may be incapable of safe driving.

Next, work with your teen to decide on a fair and appropriate prom night curfew and schedule, including pre-determined times for him/her to "check in" with you via cell phone. Finally, call the parents of teens hosting prom night parties to which your teen is invited. As well as making sure that each party will be chaperoned by responsible adults, you might also consider volunteering to help out -- or to be "on standby" in case another chaperone drops out.

Finally, click here for more tips on helping your teen enjoy a safe, sober prom night.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 5:38 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Talking To Your Teenager About Sex

Despite how difficult it is for parents to talk about sex with their teen, it's a conversation they can't afford to avoid. According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, talking about sex, love, and intimacy is one of the most important things a parent should do - for reasons including preventing teen pregnancy and instilling values. Because each child develops at their own pace, parents will have to judge when it's best to have "the talk". Learn more about talking to teens about sex from the Daily Democrat.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 10:45 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Long Term Effects for Cyber Kids

While public forums that teenagers use like MySpace and Friendster have gotten a lot of publicity lately for the personal information kids post about themselves and the risks they face from predators, parents also need to explain to their children the long term ramifications they may face by airing out their laundry in public.

As Tim Donovan recently posted on CNET.com:

“Kids who get mad at a teacher and rashly publish a scathing and obscene lampoon on a site like MySpace.com aren't thinking that it could prevent them years hence from getting a scholarship to college or obtaining a job they really want. But this can and has happened. One recent law school graduate was shocked to lose out on a prestigious clerking job for a judge when a routine background check turned up something the candidate had thoughtlessly published years before.”

Since parents and their teens are still learning about the digital trails that exist in cyberspace. As in the real world, parents must teach their tweens and teens to be responsible for their words and actions in the digital world. Read more online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 1:01 PM 0 comments

Monday, April 24, 2006

Stressed Out Teenagers

Teens today feel that they're under more stress and pressure than the generations of teenagers that came before them. Teens say the feel on edge to get good grades and be accepted. While they admit that they put some of the pressure on themselves, they say that the faster pace of life makes things harder for them to deal with. Because some teenagers try to avoid their stress in unhealthy ways, parents need to know what to look for: sudden changes in behavior or drastic changes in personality are clues that teens are at their breaking point. Read more about over-stressed teenagers from lacrossetribune.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 3:16 PM 0 comments

Friday, April 21, 2006

The Importance of Boarding School Dorm Parents

Many boarding schools require some faculty members to do the classic faculty 'triple-threat': teaching, coaching, and dorm parenting. Sometimes, it is the younger faculty members who are expected to work in the classroom, on the field, and in the dorms. Many times, however, it's a choice faculty members make because of the roles they play in students' lives. In addition to being responsible for the safety of students, dorm parents become an extension of their students' families. A residence director describes his role as '"residential mentor, guide, and guardian." Learn more about the importance of dorm parents for teens attending boarding schools from www.boston.com.

Another great site for information about boarding schools for teenagers is Teen Boarding Schools. Learn about private college prep schools for girls, boys, or co-eds.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:07 PM 0 comments

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Getting Teens to Quit Smoking

If telling teenagers that smoking and cigarettes are bad for them and can lead to a lifetime of heath problems would get them to quit or prevent them from starting, then most kids would be fine. But it's not that easy. And teens who smoke become adults addicted to smoking and tobacco. In Manitowoc County, Wisconsin, school and county officials are working together to reduce the number of smokers, especially the number of young people who smoke. There's a cessation program for teens at local high schools that helps students change their habits and many groups are advocating raising the tobacco tax, which may make cigarettes too expensive for kids to afford. Learn more about helping teenagers quit smoking from htrnews.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:16 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

College Prep Boarding Schools Offering More Financial Aid

As the competition for new students grows, expensive college boarding schools in New England are offering more financial aid and less rejection to students based on family income. Like elite colleges and universities, several prestigious and exclusive boarding schools are granting free tuition to students of families with specific income levels. Some schools are even eliminating student loans in favor of grants. The change in policy about financial aid is due to the lack of diversity in the student body. Now, students with the best academic records are being given access to schools they only dreamed of attending. Read the full article at Boston.com.

Get more information about college prep boarding schools for girls and boys at www.teenboardingschools.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 4:32 PM 0 comments

People Teens Can Turn To For Help

No matter how much parents want their teenagers to tell them everything, we all know 'just not a reality. So, when teens need someone to talk to and don't feel they can go to their parents, who can they turn to? At school, teens can talk to their counselor, a teacher or coach, or a mentor. These are adults who can have a positive influence on your child and someone that your child might feel more comfortable talking to. Faith-based organizations also offer youth groups with leaders who are trained to work with teenagers and young adults. Teens need to know that they're not alone and that adults besides Mom or Dad can help them through tough times. Learn more from the Press-Citizen.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 2:51 PM 0 comments

Monday, April 17, 2006

Teenagers Logging onto the Internet for Sex Ed

Instead of turning to their parents for answers, today’s teens are logging on to the Internet get their questions about sex answered. Teenagers say they can get their embarrassing questions answered in a confidential setting without being worried about what their parents or their friends will think about them. Health experts say that going online for sex ed can be fine as long as teens are getting their information from reliable sites with good, accurate content. Read more from KUTV.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 9:15 PM 0 comments

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Dropout Rates Reaches National Epidemic

Although exact numbers about the number of teenage dropouts aren't available, educators and researchers feel that whatever the rate is, it's now a crisis. Their best guess is that at least a third of students who start high school never make it to graduation. Some schools are thinking about interviewing students on the verge of dropping out to find out why they don't want to stay in school and many provide help to struggling students throughout all stages of their academic careers. Pregnancy and academic problems are among the leading reasons teens choose to leave school setting themselves up for a lifetime of economic struggles. Learn what the state of Pennsylvania is doing to combat teen drop outs on www.philly.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 10:01 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Choosing the Right Treatment for Your Troubled Teen

One of the most difficult choices parents may face is how to help their troubled teen. There are many options to consider, including residential treatment, therapeutic boarding schools, or wilderness therapy. Parents should stay away from the boot camp type programs which can only hurt children even more and look for nurturing and caring programs that offer proven interventions, counseling and therapy.

The Arizona Republic offers questions parents should ask programs before deciding if a program is the right choice for their teenager and their family. Read more about how to help troubled teenagers online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:53 PM 0 comments

Monday, April 10, 2006

Teenagers Benefit from Work Experience

With summer quickly approaching, teens are beginning to think about getting their first job. Teens should talk to family and friends to find out who's hiring and then be prepared to create a resume. Even if they've never had a job before, they can list their achievements and activities. The two most important characteristics adolescents need to have to make good employees are being dependable and trainable.

Teenagers say that in addition to earning money for college or just spending money from part-time or summer jobs, they learn to set goals and be responsible. Teens can also learn how to deal with conflict and problem solving.

Employers say that teens should come dressed nicely and be clean and well groomed when they apply for job. They say teens should also remember that when they're in public, they're always being observed, especially by potential employers.

Learn more about the benefits for teenagers who work from the Examiner Enterprise.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 8:49 PM 0 comments

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Helping Homeless Teens

As the Children's Action Alliance guesses about 5,000 runaway or homeless kids pass through Arizona each year the city of Tucson tries to help homeless youth with programs that provide financial assistance, basic human needs, and guidance. Tucson estimates that there are about 500 teenagers living on the street. The student group Stand Up for Kids attempts to educate students in schools about homelessness and encourages them to take other actions before they run away from home. Read more about homeless teenagers in Arizona online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 8:09 PM 0 comments

Friday, April 07, 2006

Teenagers Need Dating Rules

When teens begin to date, their parents need to set rules and boundaries so that they learn which behaviors are appropriate and which are not. Despite what they think and say, they are not adults and sometimes they are not mature enough to handle everything. Parents should set curfews, talk openly with their teens about sex, and encourage group dates. Read more dating guidelines for teenagers from the JournalStar.com.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 8:27 PM 0 comments

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Helping Children Get Past Fears

Because children have "developmental fears" well into their teen years, parents need to understand what is considered normal and what they can do to help their teenager get through whatever their concerned about. Teenagers will often fear divorce, injury, and even being alone in the dark. It’s very typical for many teens to be afraid of public speaking, crowds, and gossip. Parents can help their children by normalizing whatever their child is afraid of and not making light or teasing them about it. Read more suggestions for parents of teenagers dealing with fear from the Chicago Tribune.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 11:02 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Remember to Reconnect with Your Teen

Dr. Rachel Bryant is a licensed psychologist who believes that

“the problem with adolescence is that there is a direct negative correlation between the fear of the parent and the fear of the teen. The more afraid a parent is about their teenager's behavior, the more unafraid and bold the teenager is in opposition to their parent's real and perceived disapproval.”

Dr. Bryant suggests parents understand that while they are right to worry, they need to remember that the most important part of parenting is the relationship that exists between them and then their teens. The more teenagers and their parents argue over things, the more then need to take a step back and just reconnect. Learn more about Dr. Bryant’s parenting tips online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 5:49 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Too Much Media Hurts Kids Health

The April issue of Archives of Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine reports that issues affecting children, including obesity, risky sexual behavior, and violence, all result from too much media influence. And it starts as early as preschool, especially as Sesame Street just released a new line of videos targeted for children as young as six months. Parents need to keep in mind that TV isn't a babysitter. Too much TV leads to childhood obesity and inactivity in younger kids. In teens, it leads to steady exposure to sexual content that influences the way teenagers view themselves and their peers. Read more from Fox News.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 4:15 PM 0 comments

Teens Who Use Supplements More Likely to Use Drugs

The Journal of Adolescent Health recently reported that adolescents who use herbal supplements are more likely to use cocaine and other illicit drugs. Teenagers consider herbal products anything from vitamins to performance enhancers like creatine. The study emphasizes the need for parents and health care providers to talk to teens about their use of herbal remedies. Learn more about the link between use of herbal supplements and drug abuse in teenagers online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 12:04 AM 0 comments

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Parenting Ignorance

Parents can't pretend the Internet doesn't have its problems and choose to live life in blissful ignorance. And since they're probably not going to get a guided tour down the information superhighway anytime soon, they're going to learn to navigate it on their own - because their kids and those who prey on kids are already experts at finding personal information online. But it's every parents' job to talk to their teens about the Internet and about staying safe. Read more about what parents need to learn about the Internet to protect their teenagers online.

posted by ByParents-forParents at 5:33 PM 0 comments

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